Memento Mori

Remember Death

This little phrase, seemingly morbid to some, can really be a game changer for the life we get to live every day. For me, Memento Mori not only can be the realization that our mortal bodies will, at some point, come to an end, and the life we have been given to enjoy on this earth will be no more, but also the realization that we can put to death many of the things that we enjoy in this life. These things can be in many forms, but probably the one that intrigues me the most is the death of emotions.

We are born into this world in circumstances beyond our control. We do not get to pick our family, country, social-economic status, or physical health at birth. We are all innocent and ignorant at that point of all the forces in this world, both good and bad. As we travel through the years ahead, we encounter many people and events that can shape us in unhealthy ways that lead to lives of fear, selfishness, and self-pride. We also can encounter those who have a positive impact. These are the people who have strived to overcome the fear, selfishness, and prideful conditions of themselves, realizing that we, as fellow humans, were designed by our Creator to withstand the influences and negative things that we begin to see as teenagers and adults and to overcome those things by the good that is available for us to accomplish. It seems to me that in my life, when I allowed myself to lose sight of the good and virtuous compass that should guide each of us, life began to come off the rails. You see, I had “put to death” the emotional side of life.

Many people who get caught up in the throngs of alcoholism and addiction (of which I am one), tend to self-medicate and numb the emotions of anger, hurt, fear, and irritability. This all works ok — until it doesn’t. Once we stifle the “bad” emotions, (which really are not bad at all, they are all God-given), we also smother the good emotions of happiness, joy, and contentment until we are not much more than a shell of a being going through the physical acts of life. It is a form of death. A death of the spirit, if you will.

Now, don’t misunderstand me. I do not believe that one has to be an alcoholic or addict to succumb to this death. I believe many do this in many other ways. Pessimism is one way that I see many people fall into this trap. I think the best way to avoid it is with gratitude. Gratitude and thankfulness tend to have a way of bringing us out of the traps of selfishness and depression in ways that, for me, encourage me to live a life in the service of others. The realization that at some point for all of us, physical death will come, keeps me ever cognizant of the fact that today, right now, could very well be my last opportunity to make a positive difference on this world and for those with whom I come in contact. It could be the last day that I can tell my wife and kids that I love them. It could be my last chance to right an injustice that I have caused or where I see I can make a difference. It may be my last chance to support a cause that I believe in. It could be my last chance to have a conversation about my faith in God and my belief that Jesus is who He claimed to be and the importance of having a faith in Him. It could be my last chance to live a life that is an example of this.

I have an app on my phone titled “Wecroak.” Five times a day I get a notification that I am going to die. Some folks think this a bit weird and morbid until I explain why. The notifications are usually quoting someone concerning death. The last one was from Joan Halifax, an American Zen Buddhist teacher born in 1942. It reads:

“Whether or not enlightenment is possible at the moment of death, the practices that prepare one for this possibility also bring one closer to the bone of life.”

That, I believe, expresses the sentiment in “Memento Mori.”

I remember death so that I can truly live. For that, today, I am grateful.