The following is from an email I received recently from Kris Stump, a site member who happens to be a very old and dear friend of mine from Oklahoma. Our friendship began through a mutual friend sometime in the mid to late 1970’s. He gave me permission to share some of his writings, which I find very inspiring. This one is from a discussion about the Holy Spirit. I hope you are inspired as well.
Good Morning Kelly,
I hope that, today, you have recovered from the infusion on Monday and are feeling good. I cannot imagine the toll this whole process has on a person’s being, their whole being. You do give some insight to that although I believe there is probably much more that is not said. Although, the way you vividly describe the events of the days are most engaging, like the flat tire story with Kohlson being there to take care of it all. That really goes in line
with the Stoic’s belief that fate has people in the right place at the right time. The belief that God, although most of them were not of Christian faith, wills the good in all situations for mankind. The writings of the philosophers of ancient times from Socrates to, let’s say, Epictetus were not exposed to the life or the gospel of Christ for the most part. Christianity was just spreading through Greece and Rome in the first couple of centuries. Even though that was the case, their principles align with the teachings of Christ regarding the art of virtuous living.
That brings me to the thought of the Holy Spirit that we touched on a few weeks ago. I think of the Holy Spirit as, as Christ describes the coming of it, as a helper for sure. I think the reliance of the guidance from such to be of most importance in order to achieve somewhat of a serene lifestyle in acceptance of myself knowing that I can use the “logos”
(reasoning) capacity to think things through to the end. I do that more now than I ever have in my life. Some of my consequences of previous behavior and actions would be much less if I had learned to use that sooner, but the present is all I have to work with today. I do feel the roll is also one of comforter. I believe I have been comforted in different ways, from the assurance of forgiveness to the peace during times of grief.
Probably one of the biggest roles I have had to realize is that it’s the role of the Holy Spirit to draw others to a saving belief in Christ and that my role is to just be willing to have the conversation. My activity in AA is a real challenge in that aspect as the principle there regarding God is to “Make a decision to turn our lives over to God as we understand him.” New folks trying to come to grips with their addiction are encouraged to put everything they have ever thought about God on a shelf and come to their own understanding of God. That really bothered me at first, and I still, at times, struggle with that, but I now realize that if that is done, the conversations I can have may allow the Holy Spirit to work through me to ask the question of some, “Who do you believe Christ to be?,” a “madman or the Christ?,” as C.S. Lewis put it. In reality, I can remember sitting in a meeting during early sobriety while talking about step two, which is, “Come to believe that a power greater than myself can restore me to sanity.” I exclaimed, “I really, at this time, don’t know what I believe!” So, I guess, I also put my beliefs on a shelf while I figured it out.
I have been asked to speak tonight on the third step in our men’s meeting so I will be talking about the “God of my understanding” and how the decision is an important one. I see this as just an opportunity to talk about my beliefs and give anyone that the Holy Spirit may prod to want to talk to me about it further without giving way to the temptation to judge anyone else on what they have chosen to believe.
Well, onto my workday ahead. I really hope you do have periods of calmness and peace during this storm you are in. I thought of your situation as a storm as I listened to wind howl in a video you shared. I think you described it as some sounds that could be out of a horror movie which is, maybe, how you feel at times. I am glad you have John, your two sons, and many others to help carry you through.
Prayers and blessings my friend,
Kris
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